Are You On A Quest For The Good Life?
“Ideas alone don’t change our world for the better. Ideas that inspire action do. When we share the ideas that inspire us in a way that inspires others to take action, we can build the world we imagine.”
There is no one idea for your life. Think of the countless different lives that could have come from a single decision in your past. Where you went to school, who you decided to date, or what you decided to do for work. Your life would be unrecognizable to the person you are today. That's to say, there are many lives you could live that are filled with happiness and fulfillment. And there are lots of different paths you could take for a wildly different adventure in your life.
Here's where it gets difficult. With so many decisions of what to do with our lives, we often default to taking the path of least resistance. Your Dad went to Ryerson University? You may as well too. Your Mom became a social worker? Seems like a solid plan. Your sister knows a cute guy who has all his teeth? He's a keeper.
None of these decisions mean you're destined to live a miserable life (hell, even the guy with the pearly whites could surprise you).
Some of us have a little luck in life and fall into a career, relationship, and path that meets most of our needs.
But for the rest of us, there's that gnawing feeling that we're living someone else’s life. It eats you from the inside out. It's like that moment in Harry Potter where the Dementors of Azkaban creep in like a fog. It's the stuff of nightmares. A creature that feeds upon your happiness, consumes your soul and leaves you in a permanent vegetative state.
An unexamined life is not worth living.
Socrates, a Greek philosopher whose way of life, character, and thought had a profound influence on ancient and modern philosophy, dropped that truth bomb 2,400 years ago.
The unexamined life is the same soul-sucking Dementor creature that leaves so many of us feeling stuck, hopeless, and trapped in lives that are not of our own making.
Bill Burnett, author of Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful Life discovered that where many of us get stuck is in our initial approach to the problem. "Often we approach our problems as if they are an addition or subtraction problem. We either want to get something (add) or get rid of something (subtract). We want to get a better job, get more money, get more success, get more balance, get rid of ten pounds, get rid of our unhappiness, get rid of our pain. Or we might just have a vague sense of discontent, or a feeling that we want something different or something more."
So, what does this mean for you?
It doesn't matter where you're coming from, who you're with or where you think you're going. Hell, it doesn't even matter what job or career you have had or think you should have.
What matters is your decision in the next moment. If you choose to chart a new path for your life, this design thinking can help you build your way forward from wherever you are, regardless of whatever shit you're facing. It's important to note that design thinking can be used to improve even areas where things are going well.
When you have a clear sense of where you want to go, what you want to accomplish in life and why, you have the freedom to shift your life into simplicity.
Burnett does a brilliant job of breaking this concept into something he calls your Lifeview and Workview. Today, we're sticking with Lifeview and next week we'll dive into your Workview. "Lifeview is simply your ideas about the world and how it works. What gives life meaning? What makes your life worthwhile or valuable? How does your life relate to others in your family, your community, and the world? What do money, fame, and personal accomplishment have to do with a satisfying life? How important are experience, growth, and fulfillment in your life?"
You're probably wondering, that's sweet and all, but where do you go from here?
You start by answering some questions aimed at cracking open the safe where you keep your dreams under lock and key. If you're like me, there's a good chance these questions will make you squirm in your seat. You're on a quest for the good life so you'll have to go deep into the depths of what you believe. As Burnett describes it, the key thing is to write down whatever critical defining values and perspectives provide the basis for your understanding of life.
This should take no more than thirty minutes and be about a page in length.
Why are we here?
What is the meaning or purpose of life?
What is the relationship between the individual and others?
Where do family, country, and the rest of the world fit in?
What is good, and what is evil?
Is there a higher power? God, or something transcendent, and if so, what impact does this have on your life?
What is the role of joy, sorrow, justice, injustice, love, peace and strife in life?
Design is values-neutral. Meaning we don't take sides. You believe what you believe. The questions are meant to provoke your thoughts, and it's up to you to see which ones you want to try to answer. The only way to do this incorrectly is not to do it at all.
I'll talk more about this next week, but the secret of a happy, healthy, well-lived life comes from coherency. Meaning you're living a life where you can clearly connect the dots between three things: Who you are, what you believe, and what you are doing.
Are you at a breaking point where you're ready to slay the creature that feeds upon your happiness, consumes your soul, and leaves you feeling stuck without a way forward?
This is your chance to choose the path filled with happiness and fulfillment.
There's a wildly different adventure that's calling your name.
Will you answer?
Like most of us Edward Norton did not come fully formed. Out of a love for film and a desire to create, Ed did tons of research in order to get to where he is today.
